A Terrible Idea
by You Can Call Me Effie
Summary: L finds Nita's determination to become a suspect suspicious, so he sends Rora to gather information. It goes about as well as you would expect. Companion crossover between Manzanita and Whatever, Comp. Not Canon. I just thought it'd be funny. Oneshot


L was confused.

No, confused wasn't the right word.

Bemused?

No.

Wary?

No.

Disconcerted.

L was disconcerted.

It was an unpleasant feeling, especially to him, who had not felt so disconcerted since Rora Takamura came out of the woods.

But that was another story.

Nita, Light Yagami's girlfriend, of all people, was throwing him for a loop.

Nita, a girl with apparently no last name and too much information. Nita, who told Watari a pseudonym of a pseudonym and whose records don't show anything about her that could be helpful or true. Nita, who flaunted her knowledge and so-called intelligence and seemed to have little to no sense of self preservation.

Who had recommended a rather delicious cake.

And who was trying entirely too hard to appear suspicious.

"Sir, i have removed the most obvious cameras from Miss Niki's apartment. I have also removed the ones in the restroom for your own safety. The microphones are still intact, as are the cameras in and around her sitting room. Is there anything else you need?"

"Send Rora in, please."

Watari bowed. "Yes, sir."

A moment later, Rora came bouncing in. "Sup, panda face? Anything for the old Takamura Brain Train to turn out?"

L didn't look at her. "I would like you to help me with something."

She looked surprised. "Oh shit, really? I didn't actually mean that, I was just being polite."

"I'd hardly call that polite. In any case, you don't have a choice."

She placed her hand on her hip. "Excuse me, Comp? Care to repeat that?"

L shifted away from her discreetly. "No."

"Good." She flopped down on the couch adjacent to his armchair and pouted. "So, what is it you want me to do?"

He chewed at his thumb. "I would like you to meet someone."

Rora placed the back of her hand on her forehead dramatically. "But you know I have eyes only for you, dearest fluffy head!"

L continued. "She is a Kira suspect."

Rora shot up. "YOU WANT ME TO MEET UP WITH A SUPERNATURAL MURDERER?!"

"The chance that she is Kira is less than 2%, but I would like to make certain."

"I COULD DIE!"

"You are going to her school."

"OF BOREDOM!"

"Rora."

She pouted and sat back down. "But Cooooomp."

"No buts. You're going."

"But I don't wanna go to schooool! What will I wear?!"

"The standard female uniform."

"How will you get one of those?"

"I've taken care of it."

"When do I have to go?"

"Tomorrow."

"COOOOOOMP!"

L almost flinched. "Rora."

She huffed and crossed her arms. "Is she cute?"

"You will not flirt with the enemy."

Rora perked up. "So she is cute?"

"I suppose she would be conventionally attractive."

Rora pouted. "And I can't flirt with her."

"No."

She huffed and sat cross legged on the couch. "What do you even want me to say? 'Sup, fellow suspect, I'm here to interrogate you publicly'?"

L looked at her blankly. "Why would I want you to say that?"

Rora took a deep breath. "Never mind, Comp, What do you want me to say?"

"Speak to her like you would speak to any one else."

Rora raised an eyebrow.

L corrected himself. "Speak to her like an ordinary person would speak to another ordinary person."

Rora nodded once and cracked her knuckles. "Alrighty, Comp. Lets get this Brain Train to the metaphorical Acting Station."

It was around this time that L realized this idea was probably not one of his best, but his worst was an average person's best, so he wasn't incredibly concerned.

The next day, Rora was up and dressed earlier than usual.

She walked into the lounge. "Comp, this skirt is shorter than my attention span!"

"What attention span?"

"Exactly!"

L sighed and turned toward her. "I appreciate the dedication, but why is your hair in bunches?"

Rora shrugged. "If I'm gonna look like an anime character, I'm going to be the cute one."

L stared blankly.

Rora smiled, winked, and posed, holding up a peace sign. "Comp-sama~!"

L felt his lip twitch and turned away from her. "Watari will be picking you so shortly. Your school things are in the car. Good luck."

A moment later, Watari came to collect her. She paused at the door and waved at L. "Bye, Comp-sama~!"

There was a moment of silence before L sighed. "Bye, Rora-chan."

She stared in surprise before fist pumping victoriously and having to be dragged out by Watari.

L sighed again and went back to work.

Rora stepped out of the limo and thanked Watari for her bag. He patted her hair before driving away.

Rora sighed and started walking, looking at the papers in her hand. "Alright, where do I-GAAH!"

She fell on the floor.

The person she had walked into looked at her apologetically and helped her up. "Sorry about that."

Rora dusted herself off and looked around for her paper. She picked it up, stuffed it in her bag and looked up. "It's no problem- Yagami?!"

He looked politely confused. _What a weirdo._ "Do I know you?"

"You pulled my hair out in primary school."

Comprehension dawned on him and he flushed. He bowed. "I am sorry about that."

Rora nodded her head. "As you should be. I was half bald."

He scratched the back of his neck. "Right. I didn't know you came here."

Rora shrugged. "It's my first day. Do you happen to know where-"

A girl walked over and put her hands on her hips. "Smarty! What're you doing, we're going to be late!"

Rora blinked. _Damn. She is attractive. And she is also NOT WEARING A UNIFORM I AM GONNA KILL COMP!_ "Er..."

Yagami smiled politely. "Nita, this is..."

Rora shrugged and bowed. "Kora Takamira, old classmate of Yagami-kun."

Nita bowed back. "Nita. Just Nita. It's a pleasure."

Rora straightened up and grinned brightly. "Well, Yagami-kun and Just-san, do you know where the biology class is?"

Nita's lip twitched and she shared a look with Yagami. "Actually, that's my class. I'll take you, Takamura-san."

"Takamira. It's a common mistake."

Nita smiled and looked at her oddly. "Right. Come along then. See you later, Smarty."

"Bye, Apple. It was nice to see you again, Kora-san."

"Heck of a lot better than last time. Bye!"

Rora walked beside Nita and felt very uncomfortable. _Stupid panda detective with his stupid ability to arrest me if I don't do what he wants._

"So, Rora?"

Rora blinked rapidly and looked at Nita. "Hm?"

"How do you know Light?"

"I called him stupid in second grade so he pulled half of my hair out."

Nita stared at her for a moment before she laughed. "I must admit, I didn't expect that."

Rora decided she didn't like her. "I don't think I like you very much."

Nita looked at her slightly offendedly. "What'd I do?"

"Your name is fake, you're trying entirely to hard to appear suspicious, and your necklace gives me weird vibes."

Nita's hand flew to her necklace and her eyes narrowed. "Suspicious to what?"

"To L, of course!"

Nita looked at her incredulously and pulled her into an alcove. "I can't believe you just said that out loud."

Rora resigned herself to the routine of being regularly kidnapped and leaned against the wall. "Why not? I did."

Nita grimaced. "Look, Rora, I don't get what you have to do with this and that worries me greatly, so you need to get out of it."

Rora snorted at her. "Would if I could, sunshine, but I'm also a suspect."

She froze. "What?"

"Your hearing's fine, you heard me. I'm a suspect, you're boyf is the main, and you're barely a suspect."

"But that's not possible, you aren't canon."

Rora looked at her oddly. "We're not on a ship, lady, there are no cannons."

Nita started pacing. "Rora, tell me exactly how long you've been in this."

Rora shrugged. "Around the time Second Kira blew up some people."

Nita tugged at her own hair. "But that was months ago!"

"Good for you, you can tell time."

She pushed Rora against the wall. "Rora, you need to get out of this, you're messing it up!"

Rora kneed her in the stomach and turned them around. "What the hell?"

Nita grimaced and straightened up. "Look, I know how this goes, you aren't meant to be in this story!"

Rora threw her hands out. "Neither are you!"

Nita froze. Again.

Rora started pacing and ticking things off on her fingers. "You know far more than you should, most of which you just spew for no reason other than to bait Comp! You somehow managed to gain the attention of the most sought after nerd in the entirety of Japan, and you're together even though neither of you actually have feelings for each other! Comp doesn't even see you as a threat, which is why he sent me to come and do whatever it was I was supposed to do, I don't friggin remember. And your necklace is freaking me out, why is it glowing?!"

Nita shook herself and looked at her necklace in surprise. She looked back up at Rora and opened her mouth.

She passed out.

Rora stared incredulously for a moment before she closed her eyes, pinched the bridge of her nose, and sighed.

She dragged Nita into the middle of the hallway, and then screamed very loudly before running off of campus.

She just barely saw a teacher come running out of a nearby classroom spot Nita.

She sighed and took out her phone, dialing for Watari.

 _"Keh heh heh."_

Rora jumped and looked around. No one else was there. She shrugged as Watari answered. "Miss?"

She sighed. "I need you to pick me up."

The limo pulled up immediately and she stated before getting in. "Comp was expecting this, wasn't he?"

"I heard the whole thing."

Rora jumped. "Comp!"

He looked at her from his crouched position beside her and chewed his thumb. "You look terrible."

Rora crossed her arms, the small motion allowing the ribbon that had been loosened precariously during her small altercation to fall off and leave her with lopsided pigtails. "Thanks."

He smiled slightly and turned back to the front. "Watari, to the next hotel."

"Yes, sir."

Rora and L sat in silence through the entire ride.

 _This was a terrible idea._


End file.
